kind of embarrassing

kind of embarrassing 

but it is what it is 

a starting point to which I will progress from 

yep this was my day 

no sugar coating 

true to what I ate 

every bite 

no lie 

morning coffee 

creamer is always 

half unsweetened almond milk (sometimes the almond coconut) 

and half SF carnation 

took this with me to the gym and had on my way home 

got a good upper body in 

I can kill it at the gym 

food is my problem 

as you will see  

love these bars from Costco  

got my water in 

3 liters total today  

4 egg whites 

1 egg 

and 2 LF Eggo waffles  

coffee bean with a scoop of SF vanilla powder 

dang this puppy had 50 calories 

really 

that's a burn  

Falafel plate from Tender Greens 

lunch with the DD 

I didn't eat the bread  

SF Fro Yo  

I MAY have had 

like 4 strawberries 

while cleaning them for the hubster  

tomato and corn for dinner  

they had steak 

 I have been weirded out about meat 

since that netflicks 

food documentary  

can't remember the name of it 

maybe I blocked it intentionally 

welllllllll

I ate 3 ears 

::::::: hanging head in shame ::::::: 

3 bites of DMIL's Jello  

and 3 bites of Halo 

total was 1960

not the 1200-1500 which is my budget 

I wish I was as strict with myself as my fellow blogger Sean 

alas that's not my story 

struggle is my story 

better tomorrow 

goal will be attainable 

how about UNDER 1900?

that should be doable

whatcha think? 

yeah I am a BIG eater 

not some dainty flower here 

gots some work ta do!!! 

fer sure 

less thinking.... more doing

this blog has been a food dairy, and my attempt at being silly
I am going to go back to daily journaling via pictures
I went back to Seans turning point in 2014 
and I was also reading a farewell post (maybe)
and FogDog's frustration this morning 
and this is my conclusion:
less thinking, less planning, less analyzing, less procrastinating
more doing
more of what I AM and less of who I want to be and wish I was
food dairy was boring but it was working
being silly was more about an attempt to entertain
and about YOU
this blog is for me
see how selfish I am ..... lol
Sean made a very thought provoking statement back in a post in 2014
and I keep thinking about it this morning
You see, I tend to suffer from paralysis by analysis.
and this is SOOOOO me
so just doing
pictures later tonight of my food
what's the plan?
My fitness pal
1200-1500 calories
current BMI 26.3
goal BMI 21.8
I have been on the bubble for 18 months now
so frustrating
everyone has a different method
just going to do what works for me
the sticking to it part is the hard part for me
exactly 2 months to my birthday
let's see what I can accomplish by then

Ventura County Fair day

actually it's not 125,865,957,365,587,459,000  times 

I did the math

that would be thinking I started dieting at maybe 13

I am 57

that's 44 years 

so if I would have said to myself every morning 

it would be 16,060 times 

this is the kind of things I think of

sad... I know but that's me 

so how did I do yesterday? 

meh 

I did have 2 meals 

which were good 

but no shakes.... I had 2 bars instead 

and 2 snacks 

one was okay... the other not so much 

5 whites and 2 LF Eggo waffles 

1 Quest bar 

side salad... dressing on the side and I only ate 2 of the croutons 

2 grilled fish tacos, diodn't eat the tortillas or the rice pilaf 

1 Kirkland protein bar 

SF frozen yogurt 

chips and guacamole 

sounded better before .... huh? 

oh well 

I'll give it another go today 

we are off the the Ventura County fair today 

so I am going to be hunting grilled corn 

and strawberries while the hubster 

is munchin on fried fair foods 

last day of the fair...

it'll be a fun day 

the 125,865,957,365,587,459,000th time

been hiding 

some good days

some bad 

no consistancy 

now I am on vacation for 9 days 

plan is easy 

2 shakes, 2 meals
throw in an apple for a snack now and then

back to an old plan 

it worked so we'll see 

might be going back to days of old 

I'll give it 9 days 

I can do 9 days 

I think 

work outs are the easy part... I love this part 

food part keeps tripping me up 

so let's give this a go 

what do ya say? 

I am going for it 

I am going to ATTEMPT to blog 

every one of these next 9 days 

here I go 

for the 125,865,957,365,587,459,000th time 

hey fall down 9 times... get up 10

thats a saying ..... right? 

later 

1500=>150

okay so I am not a math whiz 

but I do know my body 

if I keep my calories under 1500 then I will stay in the 150's

maybe I should drop them to 1400? 

hummm gotta think about that some 

it felt good to be REALLY challenged these last 2 days 

I pushed it hard 

so today I will chill a bit 

but still hit the gym 

just normal day off chores 

2 more weeks until vacation 

come on!!!! 

tootles

159.8 this morning  

working out

I may swing up and down some tonnage 

counting, weighing and measureing like a mad woman 

but the gym... I got this! 

it's the immediate feel of success 

walking out totally drenched from a good workout 

ahhh this was yesterday 

and then the next day much like this morning 

my muscles are sore and this is my body thanking me 

thanking me for making good choices 

I may not do a lot of things correctly 

but this gym dealeo 

I got this 

off for legg day 

tootles

1283/161.2

so yesterday was better 

felt good about my food choices 

I didn't do any exercise but I am training this morning with my old trainer 

Just today and tomorrow 

I do good on my own but it'll be a nice change 

and tomorrow is legs 

YEAH!!! 

I haven't done a dedicated leg day since I started doing my own thing 

I go to the gym and it's kind of like a brain fart moment 

I end up doing the same handful of movements 

but that's okay 

something is always better than nothing 

calories yesterday were 1283

weight this morning was 161.2

My yearly health screening for insurance is coming up 

 I have to get to 155 in order to save $600 

they have a BMI requirement you have to be under 25

I am sitting at 26.1 

officially OVERWEIGHT 

oh man this sucks 

so I need to drop at LEAST 10 pounds 

and my waist has to be less than 35 inches 

I am at 34.5 but I have work to do 

deadline is end of September 

In the process of picking myself up 

and keeping on keeping on 

I can do this 

come on let's lose some LB's!!! 

tootles