Wednesday, January 18, 2017

where is your focus?

don't focus on the weight. Focus on the behaviors 
I read this somewhere 
so yesterday was a great day 
I only got in one shake, and I did eat some Halo top 
but no binge 
no candy 
no chips 
zip a dee doo dah!! 
so I am just going to focus on good behaviors 
being committed 
we spent the day at the museum yesterday
I took food yesterday to LACMA
no more excuses Karla 
so this morning I may have to go to the gym in weirdoo clothes 
long story 
but I am going! 
no excuses 
tootles bloggity readers 

Tuesday, January 17, 2017

The best advise

this is so where I am at 
I am in the gym 5 days a week ... this week will be 6 days 
but my food is not good 
like not good 
not good 
well change doesn't happen when you are comfortable 
this is SO EVIDENT!!!! 
my trainer posted today about not being able to out train a bad diet 
YIKES!!! I need to get it together 
today I will be tracking 
drinking my shakes 
my water 
and NO CANDY!!!!! 
NO CHIPS!!! 
everyone around me seems to have it going on but me 
time to STOP the excuses 
I will post an update good or bad tomorrow 
just so over this 
tootles me bloggity crew

Saturday, January 14, 2017

the 3 me's

so the other day I blogged about
I don't care Karla, meh meh Karla and in the zone Karla

what do all these voices in my head think of one another
boy this girl is getting a little cray cray here
but just stay with me here for a minute
I don't care Karla envy's in the zone Karla and is afraid of the meh meh me

meh meh is wishy washy and not helpful, this state of mind is very destructive... tears me down with doubt, discontent and inability to stay committed, meh meh state of mind is actually MORE destructive to me than the I don't care state of mind...

at least I don't care is in some way at peace with my decisions and in the zone is DEFINITELY committed. Commitment is the sweet spot
now the meh meh state of mind.... the place I have been for seems like FOREVER 
more like about 6 months... truthfully 
this mindset is sooooo destructive for me 
I would rather be totally in the zone 
crazy annoying in the zone (which I am so capable of) 
than here 
this mindset destroys relationships 
destroys my confidence 
eats at me 
like a plague 
 no trust anymore 
so how do I get out of this mindset meh meh land? 
lobotomy? 
searching not for a way
I know there are a million ways to get where I want to go 
I just need the mindset 
hummm 
what to do? 
what to do? 



Thursday, January 12, 2017

don't care... meh... and in the zone

it's like there are a few Karla's living inside my head

I don't care Karla:
... whatever, you will never get to your goal weight, just eat what you want, eat it whatever you deserve it. You work in grocery store and how can you be expected to manage your weight around all this food, go for it!!! you can always worry about it tomorrow, don't workout whats the point .... she is a crazy gal... she loves donuts, Mickey D's and all kinds of cookies and chips... she has no stop button. Unfortunately she is LOUD!!! 

the meh meh meh Karla 
Weight Watchers
Jenny Craig
fasting
paleo
Whole 30
Shake system
no system
tomorrow
spend a zillion dollars on stuff I won't use 
join, un-join
follow, un-follow 
start ... stop 
so so so exhausting and demotivating... 

then there is in the zone Karla, but she is like trying to find a unicorn 
she is focused
driven 
elusive 
but she is in there.... somewhere 
and any or all the above ways meh meh Karla has zone Karla can make work 
this Karla hides.... she is like the bear that hibernates..
she hides then bam she makes and appearance out of nowhere... why? no clue 
what makes her appear? ... no clue
where was she all this time? no clue
I need to find this zone Karla 
cause truth be told I am a hot mess right now
anyone seen her? 
the in the zone Karla? 
she is around for like 3 days then I don't care Karla comes... followed by meh meh Karla 

 crazy town here 
tootles 






Wednesday, January 11, 2017

HOPE

it's the theme of this year 
HOPE 
I didn't do stellar last year 
but hey I am 57!!! 
so losing weight in a year is good 
so this year goal is to end in 150's 
maybe even 140's  
and NO it won't be done in the next 
few days 
but I will get there  
patience and trust 
good old fashioned work 
commitment  
I know I will get there 
maybe not the way you would 
but in my own way 
in my own time 
on my own 
I got this  
Hope 

Monday, January 9, 2017

Rainy day here is Cali

it is an event when it rains in Southern California
we don't know how to act 
some drive 20 miles an hour on the freeway
so sure they are speeding 
ugh!!! 
others act like the rain is nothing 
and continue their 80 MPH driving 
scary!!! 
I am always sure 
rain = bad hair day  
I don't have the rain proof boots
no rain proof coat 
no umbrella 
yep... I live in So Cal 
and everyone loves to cook during the rain 
the grocery stores are swamped
hahahaha I made a funny 
rain... swamped 
I love the feeling after the rain
how clean everything feels 
the air 
how green everything is 
meanwhile 
just chillin
tracking 
counting 
planning 
exercising 
my little heart out  
peace 
tootles 

Thursday, January 5, 2017

Day 3

looking back in My Fitness Pal 
I have been in the 160's since 10/13/16
that's 2 and a half months! 
no wonder my body is fiercely holding onto the 160's!!! 
the weight doesn't want to go!!!! 
it's REAL weight loss.... not just the water weight we all love to talk about 
but that's okay I am hanging
not giving up 
not getting discouraged 
160.2 this morning.... I thought for sure I would see the 150's today 
no such luck ... I will get there 
yesterday was on point, exercise, food and water all dialed in 
today is day 4 
feeling good 
buh bye 



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