Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Crash and burn

Once about a time there was a fat girl, she waited until she was 50 years old to lose weight, fat and not too smart!!!

She lost 63 pounds in 2010, she thought there would be a finish line.... There wasn't

She struggled and struggled and has had a hard hard time

but she has been able too keep the weight off, funny it's "the weight" or "when I was big"

maybe she is bored of her food choices? Boredom? anxiety?stress? .... Excuses maybe?

No real life, I think

Today she stumbled.... No more like fell and broke her leg (metaphorically speaking)

She feels gross, like she is a failure. Like she shouldn't blog. She is a phony! Why does she even have a blog? She lost the weight? Why does she continue to blog????

Everyday is a struggle, if I eat carbs, I crave carbs... Too much fruit? Too much going on at work? heck if I know

Things I do know:
1. there is no giving up allowed
2. there is no going back
3. Tomorrow is a new day
4. A gain is expected BUT will not be the beginning of going back to fat Karla
5. Fat Karla is gone, she isn't coming back
6. Fat Karla sometimes rears her ugly head

Fat Karla was SCREAMING today and I did not fight against her

This blog entry is stupid!!

See ya tomorrow

Fatter, but I am not giving up!!!!

9 comments:

  1. Ah, the elusive "finish line". It would be nice to reach it and stop the struggle.

    That's the stuff - give Karla a good talking to and tomorrow she's bound to do better. Ha I have problems with carbs too and want more when I eat too much of them. Ever onward. :)

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  2. It was not a stupid entry it is from the heart and something we all struggle with. Something we all have felt at times...you just put it into words for us.

    I feel the same way right now...everyday is a struggle. Somedays I can fight it better than other days but I have to keep fighting because to give up would be to lose myself and who I so want to be. Never give up!!!
    "We don't drown by falling in the water...we drown by staying there"
    Keep your chin up!

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  3. Not stupid at all. Very normal. Very human. All of us who have had food/overeating/binge issues will always have that little demon lurking. We gotta be vigilant..FOREVER. And, far as I know, ain't a single perfect human on this planet. We will have screw-up days, days when the lurking demon food-freak breaks out. Then we stick them back in the dungeon with chains and move on.

    All is forgiven, says Our lady of Weight Loss. Move on with your wonderful, victorious, no longer fat self!

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  4. Okay... so you are renewing yourself! Good for you! We all get to do that everyday.

    No giving up. Amid eating too many carbs or not exercising enough... your infinite value and worth has not changed one tiny bit. Still accomplished amazing things. Same talents, same abilities, same sweet soul. Still a Rockstar, girl! A Rockstar that never gives up. ((( Hugs )))

    ~Margene

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  5. I am a first time commenter. Blogging when you feel this was is a perfect way to regroup yourself in this life quest. I just started reading your blog and you are amazing. Sometimes we have downswings. Remember that your always going to have an upswing around the courner. Keep going.
    Hey check out my blog, it's nice to get followers that are on the same quest.

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  6. It happens to all of us and more than likely not once!
    But you know what you have to do and I have no doubt that you will do it :)

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  7. Try this instead:I am a miracle. To honor my own existence, I will live like a wonder and a marvel. I will do what teases the truth out of the air. I will get up and dance.

    In other words - YOU ARE NOT STUPID OR FAT! YOU ARE AMAZING AND BEAUTIFUL!

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  8. The Ghost Of Fattie Past does rear her ugly head from time to time.
    Maybe she and the Ghost of Fattie Future can duke it out, to see who (whom?) will get possession of my Once And Skinny Soul.
    In the mean while, we can recoup and regroup and know that there will be days like this - It's just The Crazy Brain! See, when you expose it for what it really is, it goes away!
    Karla, you really are successful and beautiful - and very nice!

    ReplyDelete

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