Friday, April 3, 2015

Resentment

So this is may be a touchy subject but it has been bothering me for a few days and I know resentments used to be a trigger for me and drinking so..... since I am handling my food sobriety now Big Book style I am going to blog about it... to start a few Big Book Quotes that are in my mind right now and have been lately 
... resentment is a deadly hazard to an ...   BB To Wives, p.117   View TO WIVES chapterNever forget that resentment is a deadly hazard to an alcoholic.
11.
... resentment is infinitely grave.   BB How It Works, p.66   View HOW IT WORKS chapter
But with the alcoholic, whose hope is the maintenance and growth of a spiritual experience, this business of resentment is infinitely grave.
... resentment, jealousy, envy, frustration, and fear.   BB To Employers, p.145   View TO EMPLOYERS chapter
The greatest enemies of us alcoholics are resentment, jealousy, envy, frustration, and fear.

14.
... resentment leads only to futility and unhappiness.   BB How It Works, p.66   View HOW IT WORKS chapter
It is plain that a life which includes deep resentment leads only to futility and unhappiness.

I understand and get that different things work for different people... I get that 

I know 5 folks that have had one kind of surgery or another 

3 lap banders...
1 Vertical sleeve
1 gastric bypass 

the three lap banders thought it was an easy fix.... 

2 lost quickly... loved it... ate snickers bars, Coke and chips nibble nibble nibble style and regained their weight 

1 had some complications early on... don't know the details... but after a few years.. saw they needed to put in the work and is doing AMAZING and looks awesome!!!! You go girl HOOT HOOT ---


the others have had some level of success one more so than the other ... here is where I get resentful... and I actually talked to one of these folks the other day about it... 


I am not wrong... or stupid... I get it ... but my feelings are my feelings 


here they are -----> 
These type of things are not a "fix" they still have to do the work 
I get that 
but they do HELP 


sometimes.. I wish I had a boost of help in losing and maintaining weight loss 

there it is ... 
my resentment 

and I was going to be all apologetic about it 
but I am not going to 

sorry not sorry 

sometimes I wish I had a little extra help 

there I feel better 



4 comments:

  1. I understand how your feel Karla. I have lost over a hundred pounds without surgery and have been maintaining for several years but I have to work at it every day and it's often a struggle.

    One friend had the gastric bypass and can still eat all the junk she wants as long as it's in tiny amounts. She eats exactly the way she did pre-surgery. Another friend had the sleeve and it removed the part of her stomach that control hunger (leptin) so she can eat very little and not want more. I think both of these are great and wish I had them.

    I was scared to death of lifelong complications though so never pursued it very far.


    I hope you have a good Easter and that your store is not too crazy tomorrow. I went to mine tonight and it was a madhouse.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Karla, I have had WLS and still struggle everyday, still have to log my foods on my fitnesspal, still have to exercise just as much. The sleeve does slow me from eating the volume....but All the crap foods (cookies,candy,ice cream) slides through no problem. It's not been as much help for me as I hoped. In the end the answer is still......eat healthy and exercise 😮
    Happy Easter !

    ReplyDelete
  3. I break out in resentment every now and again too. About diabetes, about having to track more than points, about orher stuff too especially stupid work stuff that really is Serenity Prayer stuff. Sometimes I get fierce & tell myself to suck it up. Sometimes I go find a book or take a walk. Just not gonna let myself stay there. Hang in there, you know how to do this!

    ReplyDelete
  4. I hear ya. Great blog post. I consider myself very lucky that I was able to afford the lap-band surgery back in 2009 (no insurance). I know that I would be working harder at dealing with hunger if I didn't have my band. Hang in there my friend! :-)

    ReplyDelete

Blog Archive