Saturday, July 9, 2016

we all need support

so this is a lazy Karla reflecting on how far I have come post 
I showed this to a friend the other day and she could not believe this was me 
this was normal weight for me while my kids were growing up 
230-220 I remember.... horrible... 
cutting the tags out of my jeans because I couldn't face the size I was 
18 or 20... I don't remember... because I couldn't face the number and purposely hid it from myself and I would have been modified if my husband saw the size..... duh he saw me 
the only way I would reach my toenails to cut them was to wedge myself between the wall and the vanity in our old house... if was a MAJOR struggle 
diet pills 
Weight Watchers a million zillion times 
more diet pills 
and more diet pills  
I actually felt thin in this picture 
I was right at 200 pounds 
but drinking like a fish 
damaging so many relationships but so stuck 
in my alcoholism I couldn't see it 
thank you God, and AA for getting me sober 
took me a few times 
but I always seem to need to test a solution  
weight watchers on my own... never officially joined 
but I started this blog 
and the support of so many others came pouring in 
wow support helped me find sobriety 
maybe support will help me with weight also 
ya think? Einstein I ain't 
my all time low 
I felt AMAZING 
138 
but I was only eating 1200 calories 
hummm
can't live on that 
and I pulled away from supportive folks 
and this happened 
back to 181
dang blink and that weight comes back 
bamm!! 
like a freakin boomerang!  
this was taken literally a minute ago
yep those are my PJ's 
154 this morning 
I can wear a size 6 again 
eating about 1500 calories a day 
gym 5-6 times a week 
2 cleanse days 
I would really like to get back into the 130's 
but we will see 
I committed to myself a FULL year 
a FULL year of Isagenix
a FULL year with a trainer 
and already I know that ain't gonna happen 
I found my nitch 
love my trainer and the supportive gals and network
 she has lead me to so I am not looking at a year...
 more like YEARS ... SUPPORT is the key I believe 
support is out there 
I have got to be one of the most socially awkward people out there 
I am a good faker ... I have to be I am a store manager
but when you work 50 hours, commute 10 hours a week 
family and kids I put the rest on the back burner 
now I get it 

I need YOUR support people 
and you are out there 
feeling just like I am/did 
you go join a gym 
join a Facebook group 
join a hiking club 
join a yoga studio 
something!!! 
go 
go now!!! 



1 comment:

  1. Amazing story and success. Thanks for the inspiration to keep fighting!

    ReplyDelete

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